Red Letter Christians

Faithful Christianity Means a Walking Hypocrite?

by Andrew Marin Friday, April 8th, 2011

A couple months back my good friend Adam McLane posted these profoundly truthful words on feeling like a hypocrite. When I read it I quickly remembered a series of conversations I’ve recently had. Before I get into those let me tell you this, even if some may disagree:

I am intentionally, and with a humble spirit, trying my best to live as faithful of a life to God and to others as I possibly can for as long as I am here on earth.

But just because that is my goal doesn’t mean it’s always (or even sometimes) a reality. Therefore because I cannot live up to my standard of life, by default, at a baseline level I am a walking hypocrite. Let’s be honest though; “by default” is only the starting point of my hypocrisies that daily occur. Back to the recent conversations…

In the past eight days I have had three different Christian people ask me in private at separate times if I ever feel like a hypocrite. They asked because they are all leaders in their churches and have recently been feeling like their good intentions to live a successful life is wearing on them. They have to lead each day and preach each week, and each said they felt some type of unknown burden or oppression about having to set some type of ”successful” life for their congregations to look-up to. These pastors are struggling with shame and guilt and doubt like the rest of us. But because of who they are they feel like they can’t keep it real all of the time – especially in front of their churches.

That is the problem with church culture today.

We’re setting up believers in Jesus to fail.

From my personal life, I talk in public so much that many people from all over the place call/email/Facebook/tweet/look up to me; asking me for advice and help and a new way forward. Like I have all the answers? I don’t. I try as best as I can to faithful keep moving forward whether sprinting forward or hanging on by the skin of my teeth. And the way I try to live my life and therefore, answer all of those questions, is to keep it real.

Because let’s be honest again … I’m a walking hypocrite.

I prayerfully wish I had the strength and courage to always practice what I preach. I don’t. I prayerfully wish I had some supernatural power to not get so pissed when I feel stabbed in the back. I don’t have that either. I prayerfully wish I always thought the “right” thoughts – pure and holy on a number of different topics. As much as I seem to try, it never quite works out. I prayerfully wish I had the drive to read the Bible and pray for hours on end everyday (let’s throw physical exercise in that category too). Not so much. I prayerfully wish I had to the ability to take-back a bunch of situations where I’ve deeply hurt people, whether intentionally or not. But that’s not going to happen. I prayerfully wish I could have a Jamba-Juice-style-brain-memory-boost to remember things better and more rightly, so that I would never be embarrassed or ashamed or nervous to speak about my memories. Well, nothing points to that happening either.

I carry a bunch of guilt and shame and doubt everyday of my life. And it scares me to death that I’m leading folks in the wrong direction. It’s been really hard for me to ‘get up’ to teach recently (not normal for me!) because all I want to do is honor God through my actions and my words while simultaneously honoring all of humanity in the same breath; which I know I’m trying to do, but in a God-fearing way not sure I actually ever accomplish.

But the more I think about it the more I am coming to a new conclusion I’ve never thought about before:

You will never feel like a hypocrite if you’re not intentionally, boldly and sustainably living a countercultural faith in real-time in the public. (and by “public” I’m not referring to media or blogs, I’m referring to your own life, family, friends, co-workers and community)

Here’s the kicker: That’s why it’s so easy for the critics and gatekeepers out there to point a finger at those of us who are. It’s because they legitimately don’t feel like a hypocrite because they’re not living a distinct life that puts them in situations where the real-time juxtaposition of life, faith, action and reason all come together in one big cluster-f&%*. And it’s in that moment that the humbly faithful feel like a hypocrite.

Yet it’s in that same moment that you know you’re living the right way. Even if you, or especially I, might not believe it.

Call me a hypocrite then. I’m going to now claim it anyway.

Are there times, and what are they, when you feel like a walking hypocrite?

Much love.

—-
Andrew Marin (@Andrew_Marin and www.facebook.com/Marin.Andrew) is the President and Founder of The Marin Foundation which works to build bridges between the LGBT community and the Church. Andrew is the author of the award winning book, Love is an Orientation: Elevating the Conversation with the Gay Community (InterVarsity Press, 2009), which has won more awards than any other individual book in the long-standing history of InterVarsity Press. He and his wife, Brenda, live in the Boystown neighborhood of Chicago.


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  • Jeff E.

    Bottom line is shut your mouth if your not going to live the life. its quit simple people feel guilty because they are telling people how they must live, and in return not living it themselves. This is what the world see’s and criticizes. Funny thing is you didn’t hear people calling Mother Teresa or Gandhi hypocrite did you…no. don’t be a walking hypocrite, is that the level we now have come down to as Christians….sad.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1388514701 Greg Dill

    Catholics venerate their Pope and dead saints, and Protestants venerate their pastors and dead theologians. When will we all stop looking at the ways of man and instead look to our Savior as the model for which we emulate our lives? I’m a missionary and I am also needlessly looked up to, just because I’m a missionary. But, people (my supporters, friends, and churches) know who I really am and how I really live. I’m a normal person like anyone else who falls and slips everyday. I need God’s grace everyday And, because of this I am not a hypocrite. Maybe some of us should stop pretending to be someone we’re not, and just be real and transparent. Then, you won’t have to worry about being a hypocrite.

  • Brad

    “Are there times, and what are they, when you feel like a walking hypocrite?” Not usually. Being a follower of Christ doesn’t mean I have to be perfect. Peter and Paul weren’t perfect. So I do not feel the pressue – or the need to be perfect. But there are times when I am a hypocrite, (I know it, and trust me, so do others). I strive to be closer to Christ, and to grow more Christ like. So I am less likely to be a hypocrite now, than I was last year. I hope to be better next year. When I see it, I do try to stop it. Repent, repent, repent. But I do not carry the guilt or the pressure (as I am not purposly leading a double life – which would rightly casue guilt). All I can do is what I know, and I strive to know more, grow more, and abide more in HIM more – so that I can be transformed. No where in the red – or black – letters am I called to be perfect. I am called to rely on the perfect One. Hope this make sense.

  • Johneconner

    I believe that we have set ourselves up for failure with the doctrine of “being a new creature in Christ Jesus” as if the moment we surrender we become perfect, holy, sinless, all-loving, all-forgiving saints…not only laughable but completely unrealistic. We change and grow moment by moment, day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year, and as we crucify our flesh (the ego) and become more and more surrendered to Jesus and His will for our lives, these character defects begin to fall away. I actually listened to a sermon in which the pastor somewhat sheepishly admitted that he “occasionally sins” but those instances are few and far between…really? I don’t know about you guys, but I sin every day – if not by direct commission (flat out doing the deed) than by omission (failing to due what God has requested we do) or in my attitudes, words, thoughts, and most of all my judgemental, critical, holier-than-thou fault-finding spirit! Thank God for grace and the sacrifice of Christ on the cross, and for The Holy Spirit, because without Him I wouldn’t stand a snowballs chance in you-know-where! Scripture says “confess your sins one to another” – let’s get real with each other and quit playing “church” and pretending we don’t have any skeletons in our walk-in closets. It’s amazing – since I shared my testimony at my church about being a former heroin addict/criminal/street thug, more men have approached me just wanting to get together and talk, to get some things off their chests so to speak…open up Christians – be the change you want to see in the world! Preach your sermon(s) with your life, not your lips…may God richly bless you all!

  • Helen

    I appreciate this sentiment. I know that I am probably a hypocrite more than I ever realize…Probably at any given moment I am violating God’s purpose and/or intent in some way… It’s like trying to plug up a dam with my finger…Block one mistake or bad habit and another comes out from around the side. I can’t afford to let this be my identity, though. I have to let Jesus’ work on the cross be enough and focus on living not in my weaknesses, but in the identity that my Papa God has given me, child of God, fearless and free. If I believe I am just a sinner, then that’s what I will be. If I take it to the next step and believe that not only did Jesus die to solve that issue (among many other things) but that His righteousness is now mine and therefore I am a saint, I am more likely to live that out..I manifest on the outside the focus I have on the inside. Know what I mean? It isn’t that I just do whatever I want to do, it’s that the more I renew my mind to see myself as God does, the more natural the fruit of the Spirit will manifest in my life, the less I have to strive to be righteous in my own strength.

  • Anonymous

    Yes, but as I experienced more and more frustrations at church and distanced myself more and more, I felt free to express myself because one of the things I had distanced myself from was the disapproval of others.

  • Steve

    14 So the trouble is not with the law, for it is spiritual and good. The trouble is with me, for I am all too human, a slave to sin. 15 I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. 16 But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good. 17 So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.
    18 And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[d] I want to do what is right, but I can’t. 19 I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. 20 But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.

    21 I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. 22 I love God’s law with all my heart. 23 But there is another power[e] within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. 24 Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? 25 Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord.

    Romans 7:14-25

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1388514701 Greg Dill

    Wow Jeff. Very Christ-like of you.

  • DKL

    Thanks for this article Andrew. I can identify with the experience you describe. What has begun to set me free in this respect is nurturing an intimate intentional relationship of confession & encouragement with a fellow walking hypocrite. We confess specifically, admonish directly, forgive completely and encourage passionately.

    This is not new, but it can be an oasis in the desert.

  • Jennifer A. Nolan

    This is a very interesting discussion. I can’t help thinking that we would feel a bit less like hypocrites if we vowed to ourselves and our Lord to talk less and do more — do more of what we want to see, do more of what we consider the good Christian life. We will speak louder and longer with our deeds than with our big mouths. For instance, I intend to participate in the Sojourners’ Hunger Fast for a moral and compassionate budget — but I have to work a rigorous job to make ends meet. So, most days, I just miss meals and make the meals I do eat smaller than I’m used to. It’s not enough, but somehow, I think I would look foolish if I damaged my health over this issue, which would be counterproductive. Fortunately from the standpoint of matching up promises and action, I owned up to this to duhsciple earlier this week.

  • Jennifer A. Nolan

    If anyone wonders where I made that confession, it was about the 6th or 7th of April, on the Sojourners’ God’s Politics blog, on the “Why I Am Fasting (Again)” thread.

  • Jdwarner2

    I know theologians who love strippers, Martin Luther King had a mistress, Gandhi didn’t quite embrace his self-imposed celibacy, and Kalil Gibran was an alcoholic.  Does this invalidate their ministry.  Many catalysts for the Christian movement have been homosexuals.  I’m pretty sure the effects of grace extend way beyond our capacity to comprehend grace itself.

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